11 Jan 2011

In Which Amanda and Bethany Survive a Wedding Exhibition *

8th of January in the year 2011 (AD)

2:24 PM: I still can't believe I am about to enter a "Bridal Convention". holy hell.

2:29: dear lord. there is going to be a cake dive. a cake dive people.
and it turns out the tickets were not complementary.
there damn well better be free champagne and cupcakes.

2:33: hmmmm, this may be the same venue, but this is nooooo build boston.

2:41: UPDATE - Single Ladies will not be played at our wedding. (there is a wedding band exhibiting their talents. nothing against said band.)

2:42: also, no calligraphy of any kind.

2:48: mission accomplished...CAKE PROCURED!

cake! (ignore the expression. cake does that to me.)

2:54: it just occurred to me that I must look like quite a fool walking around constantly scribbling things in my moleskin notebook.
and then I realize I do not stand out one bit.

3:04: skinny models are walking down the catwalk in wedding dresses and I am sitting here scarfing down multiple pieces of cake. awkward.

3:22: Lauren Bridal's slogan - "walk in a princess. walk out a queen". oh dear.

3:31: the fashion show audience is comatose. they had to play canned applause. no joke. I blame the cake.

3:34: the dj plays 'Hot Stuff'. The Full Monty flashback ensues.

3:44: I finally run across a booth peddling something I can get behind, a vintage photoshoot! they turn photos into guinness adverts! [the image of which I unfortunately could not find] beyond cool. Vintage Girl Studios.

[too bad they are not what I consider "in my price range". per usual.]

3:56: there are casino tables in the corner of the exhibition hall. pretty sure they were set up purely for the dudes that got dragged along by fiances/mother-in-laws, but they have a steady crowd around them. never underestimate the draw of losing money very very quickly. and that is no accident they are placed directly adjacent to the bar.

3:58: MORE CAKE!!

4:19: AMANDA HAS WON SOMETHING! in the raffle! she has won a free engagement photo session with one of the photographers at the convention! WOOHOO!
[there was supposed to be a picture of amanda smiling and holding up her prize here, but I apparently don't know how to work her camera phone. so instead here is a picture of a hedgehog.]

4:23: well shucks. no free honeymoon trip to st. lucia for me...

4:29: five girls are about to dive into a huge wedding cake after two diamond wedding bands. they're wearing bright pink smocks. this should be interesting.

4:30: it was not nearly as interesting as I hoped it would be.

4:31: oh well. we're calling it a day. off to the bar!

*but just barely


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